Nobody Told Me This Part: Caregiving, Loss, and What Comes Next

Episode 10: When It Goes Completely Wrong

You try the new thing, or make the big decision, and it blows up in your face. It's one of the biggest fears keeping caregiving women frozen after loss. In this episode, Shelby tells the true story of two houses, two decisions made in almost identical circumstances that landed in completely opposite places, and what she learned about surviving the ones that go wrong. Feelings aren't facts. And you've survived worse than this.

I didn't mention it during the episode because I was so into the message, but if you'd like to work with me, I have a new way to do that. It's called Steady Ground Sessions.  You can find out more about it at https://shelbydellarosa.com/steadyground

Episode 9: Did the Weight Lift?

You named it. The grief, the guilt, the hollow feeling, the empty abyss. But naming something doesn't make it stop weighing on you, does it? There's still more to understand, and that's exactly what we're doing in this new series. Not to stay in the hard stuff, but because understanding it is what finally starts to lift it. The sunshine is coming, friend. Let's walk toward it together.

If you'd like to check out the Steady Ground Sessions for 1-on-1 time with me, please visit: https://shelbydellarosa.com/steadyground

Episode 8: My Grief Toolkit

When your brain is foggy from loss, deep self-help books take too much energy.

In this episode, Shelby shares the simple, low-pressure items that got her through her hardest days—from her late mother’s blanket to cozy TV loops and messy acrylic paints.

Learn how to build your own tiny toolkit of physical comforts to help you anchor your body and survive the afternoon.
Connect at https://shelbydellarosa.com/podcast or subscribe at https://shelbydellarosa.com/podcast

The books that I was able to follow, because they were readable in short bursts, were
→ The Empty Chair (free to read if you have Kindle Unlimited) by Susan J. Zonnebelt-Smeenge, R.N., Ed.D and Robert C. De Vries
→ Grace for the Widow: A Journey through the Fog of Loss by Joyce Rogers
→ Blessed & Beyond: A Passage into Widowhood by my beautiful friend, Jaca DePriest
*these are not affiliate links

Episode 7: The Things People Say

At least he's not suffering" or "You're so strong!"

Well-meaning family and friends often say the absolute wrong things to a grieving caregiver. In this standalone episode, Shelby validates the frustration and loneliness of those clumsy comments. Learn how to drop the pressure to look "healed" for others, set gentle boundaries, and protect your peace.

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Connect at shelbydellarosa.com or subscribe at shelbydellarosa.com/podcast

Episode 6: One Breath at a Time

How do you actually live your life after a massive, identity-shifting loss?

In this final installment of our inaugural series, Shelby shares the gentle wisdom she wishes she could whisper to her 47-year-old self sitting on the couch. She breaks down why you must protect your own healing timeline from the well-meaning pressure of others, and what "moving forward, one breath at a time" practically looks like in her life today—from morning cups of coffee to launching this very podcast.

If you are ready to stop staggering and start gently getting your bearings, this 10-minute episode is your invitation to step into the present moment.

Need some regular encouragement for the journey? I send out weekly(ish) encouraging notes via email. You can sign up for them here.

If you'd like to begin exploring who you are, what you like (and don't) with someone who has been in your shoes, I'd love to welcome you to a Who Am I Now? 75-minute session with me. No pressure. No big plans. Just a simple step or two to start you on your journey to discovery.

Episode 5: Finding Your Spark

How do you start finding joy again when you’ve completely forgotten how to have fun?

In this episode, Shelby shares a heartwarming and messy step in her own healing journey: visiting a local paint-your-own-pottery studio and eventually buying cheap acrylics to make art that, by her own admission, "really sucked." She discusses the profound guilt that comes with experiencing pleasure after loss, and how she used the memory of her husband Rich—her biggest cheerleader—to give herself permission to play.

If you are terrified that finding joy means betraying your person's memory, this 10-minute episode is a gentle invitation to try something small, messy, and entirely for you.

If you'd like to begin exploring who you are, what you like (and don't) with someone who has been in your shoes, I'd love to welcome you to a Who Am I Now? 75-minute session with me. No pressure. No big plans. Just a simple step or two to start you on your journey to discovery.

Episode 4: Who Am I Now?

What do you do when the caregiving ends, the distractions are turned off, and you are left staring at a completely empty calendar?

In this heavy but deeply necessary episode, Shelby talks about the moment her grief counselor asked her a simple question: "What do you do for fun?"—and the terrifying realization that she had no answer.

If, after caregiving, you find yourself starting completely over in midlife, staring into what feels like an empty abyss of identity loss, this 10-minute episode is a gentle validation that you are not useless, you are not alone, and an empty space is simply a place where something new can eventually be built.

If you'd like to begin exploring who you are, what you like (and don't) with someone who has been in your shoes, I'd love to welcome you to a Who Am I Now? 75-minute session with me. No pressure. No big plans. Just a simple step or two to start you on your journey to discovery.

Episode 3: The Summer on the Couch

Why is it that you can easily summon the energy to do laundry, buy groceries, and manage your family's needs, but getting up to do something for yourself feels entirely impossible?

In this episode, Shelby opens up about her own "summer on the couch" following the loss of her husband. She shares how her late mother's blanket, alongside endless loops of Love It or List It and House Hunters, became a necessary psychological sanctuary.

If you are running on caregiver autopilot but feel completely paralyzed when it comes to your own self-care, this 10-minute episode will give your exhausted body permission to simply rest.

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